That Time I Broke My Nose

INTRODUCTION
Lots of guys like to brag about how something in particular is big in size. Today’s topic, however, is about something else that doesn’t get bragged about with regard to size.

I have a huge nose. There is no getting around it. Literally, we’ve tried traffic signs and everything. Yes, I’m exaggerating to make a point.

This entry was inspired by the Johnny Depp defamation trial, in particular where Amber Heard talked about having a broken nose, but then she went on TV the next day and looked and acted just fine.

I don’t buy her broken nose testimony, not only because I’ve seen serious broken noses in the past, but also because I once broke my own nose.


THAT FATEFUL DAY
It was back in 2001, a few months before 9/11, when I was in the lobby of the office building where I worked, at 444 S. Flower Street in Los Angeles. This building is somewhat famous, having been used in the television show LA Law. Specifically, this building can be seen in the show’s intro, and everyone refers to it as “the LA Law building.”

The lobby had [and may still have] pristine glass walls, including glass doors and a glass revolving door.

The actual glas revolving doors in the lobby of 444 S. Flower Street. It’s so clean that you can barely see the glass wrap-around that encases the glass doors.

I was about to hit the elevators to go to the office, when a co-worker saw me. He was very excited to tell me something.

“There’s a truck out there giving out free coffe and mugs! They’re going to leave soon, so hurry if you want some!”

Free coffee? Hell yea!! I was very pumped. I pushed my way through the revolving doors. I had thought that I was past the glass wrap-around that encases these revolving glass doors.

I had not.

I run full-force right into the glass, and left an incredibly large blood smudge all across it.

I didn’t let this stop me from getting my free coffee. It hurt like hell and my face was numb. But that was just the beginning.


THE AFTERMATH
I got my coffee, went upstairs, and put it on my desk. Then I went to the bathroom to see. There was blood everywhere. No wonder everyone was looking at me strangely while I was walking around.

Also, what looked like a piece of bone had broken through my skin at the top bridge of my nose. All of it was numb, and I was still riding the adrenaline train, so I did what any average person would do, and I forced it back in place.

It hurt like hell, but it also felt more “normal,” in a way.

I sat down at my desk to work, when I realized that I couldn’t remember who I was. I couldn’t remember anything. I was crying non-stop. My face was swollen.

Plus, I had a concussion.

NOBODY suggested that I go to the hospital. Nobody showed any concern about my well-being. To be fair, this was in a corporate workplace, where nobody cares about humans, so the problem transcends the people with whom I worked.

I sat there confused for the entire day. I didn’t log in. I didn’t get anything done. I just cried and struggled to remember who I was and what I was doing in this building.


THE DAY AFTER
My brain fog persisted, although I was regaining my memory and general faculties. While I don’t know how I drove home, I did remember driving to the office, so that was evidence enough that I was better.

I probably shouldn’t have been allowed to drive home, and I wasn’t in any condition to make any serious decisions. I just got lucky.

So I went to the security desk and reported what happened yesterday. They had someone talking with me. They asked if I felt fine, and I said mostly.

The conversation ended with me signing a document and telling them that I will not sue them, so long as they etch some frosting at around eye level on the glass parts that encase the revolving doors.

I suspect that they never lived up to their promise, as it would compromise the beauty of the building. You know, corporate aesthetics over human safety.

And I’d be willing to bet that someone, somewhere in that lobby has yelled out, “Free coffee!” more than once in the past 21 years.


MY SIMPLE AMBER HEARD ASSESSMENT
In watching how she did on James Corden the day after he supposed broken nose, two black eyes, and a busted lip.

Not only would NO ONE be able to really hide this type of injury, especially the day after, I would also suggest that one would probably not be this coherent after having their nose broken in an altercation, which would probably be more violent than the case of me breaking my own nose by running 6 inches into a glass wall.

It simply does not add up.

Part of me wants to stay away from this entire story. But another part of me relates to heavily to Mr. Depp’s involvement with a woman who suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder [BPD].

I will admit that I may be biased, due to my experience with being in a relationship with someone who has BPD. On the other hand, I know precisely how this kind of relationship goes. I know what kind of problems a person with unchecked, unacknowledged BPD can cause.

It’s not good.


IN THE END
Based on my own viewing of raw, live court video streams, in real time, I am conviced that Ms. Heard is lying heavily. I hope that Mr. Depp comes out of this with his reputation restored.

Shame on Disney for dumping him when he hadn’t been convicted. Accusations are a dime a dozen.

As for her, my hope is that Ms. Heard can learn from this, get help for her BPD [via Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, or CBT], and that she will reach a place where she won’t put anyone else, or herself, through another mess like this.

But the biggest over-arching general thought that I have here revolves around the Me Too Movement, which has some dangerous and irresponsible slogans.

  1. Listen and believe.
  2. Believe all women.

To give my opinion on this some context, I have my own Me Too story. Basically, I was going to entertain as a Pee-Wee Herman impersonator for a bachelorette party. When I got there, all 6 women were completely drunk. It didn’t take long for them to start attacking me, while clamouring about how they needed to have a stripper at the party.

I experienced some major lacerations and my suit got ripped up. I drove myself straight to the police station and told them what happened. They accused me of “bragging” about a half dozen women trying to rip my clothes off. After I demanded that they take a report, they threatened to arrest me if I didn’t leave. So I drove myself to the hospital and got stitches.

Now that you have context, here are my thoughts on those two slogans.

Both of those slogans are highly irresponsible, and people like Ms. Heard tend to take advantage of this. The irresponsibility of these slogans has been supported by society, and that needs to stop.

In the name of equality, I would submit that women are just as capable as men when it comes to lying, cheating, stealing, or even killing. This is NOT because they are women, but rather because they are human.

Believe all women? No, because some women lie. They want revenge for their pain. Listen and believe has the exact same problem. And since I am pointing out the problem, I would like to offer my own solution. It’s one that would satisfy me, as a victim of sexual assault, and I hope that it would satisfy the women who are victims as well.

My slogan suggestion, which better supports ALL victims of sexual assault is this:

Listen, take seriously, and investigate.

You don’t have to automatically believe. In fact, the police, the medical personnel, and even the judge doesn’t have to believe. It’s not part of their job. But they need to take sexual assault and domestic violence more seriously.

Part of taking it more seriously involves not branding men as perpetrators by default, or women as helpless victims by default.

Treat everyone like the humans they are, and get to the truth. If we could do this, then we’d have fewer bodies left in the wake of this irresponsibility.

Oh, and if you get your nose broken, go to the hospital immediately and get checked out. Even if you break it yourself.


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Published by DrumWild

Writing about drums, music, and philosophy.

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